Change seems to be one of those events in life that can throw any of us off our game. Sometimes we want change and it doesn’t happen fast enough, and sometimes we want circumstances to stay the same, yet they seem intent on changing. And then there are times where we have let go of something and we are in the gap between the old and the new. Circumstances and events are yet to unfold and we can feel like we are in limbo.
All of these different stages can be challenging. My experience of what I know, and have seen with people I have in my life, is that as we become more conscious, more aware of ourselves and how life works, we experience the third scenario more frequently. We are more in tune with ourselves to know when something isn’t working in our lives. We notice and pay attention to the little nuisances of being out of alignment with something or someone.
We know we need to let go of something as it doesn’t work for us anymore. We go through the process of letting go, knowing it is for our higher good. But now what? The analogy I like to use is that we are driving down a highway and we don’t know what exit to take, or maybe we haven’t even seen an exit for a while and are wondering when the next one might come along. So we keep driving. What choice to we have, life must go on, but there is a lack of determination and energy moving forward.
I am the first to admit I struggle with this in my own life. I struggle with the notion that maybe the Universe is testing me; testing me to see if I really want what I say I want. I’m not ready to commit to the notion that the Universe tests us though. I believe the Universe is loving and supportive and wants us all to succeed and be happy. I move on to other ideas.
Maybe divine timing is at play. I like the idea that perhaps certain pieces of the puzzle are not yet in place, and my job is to be patient and wait. I do believe that this happens sometimes, but it can’t possibly be the explanation for all the times, could it? I don’t know about you, but patience isn’t one of my strongest qualities. So then what? What reason could there be for this gap?
I have come to see that this gap is an opportunity to realign myself with what I want. For example, perhaps you’ve been in the process of letting go of a group of friends that you know are not resonating with you anymore. This can happen often if we’ve gone through other major changes in our lives such as moving, getting married, divorced, etc. Our friends may not fit our life anymore and we find ourselves spending less and less time with them. But new friends have not appeared. It can be a scary and lonely place to be.
While we are in the midst of trying to determine how to deal with our older friendships, we may not be spending time thinking about what kind of new friendships we now want. The gap is an opportunity to sit quietly with your thoughts and feelings and decide how you want circumstances to look. I visualize myself sending that message of my desires out into the Universe. I also go as far as hearing back from the Universe, “Oh, that is what you want now…”. As if I’m placing an order and the Universe will now shift situations to bring me into alignment with what I now want.
It’s a time to become really clear about what you want. The key is to not worry about the “hows”, or to put limitations on your desires by what you think is possible. People who create exceedingly joyful, fulfilled lives don’t ask for what they think is reasonable, they ask for what they really, really want. They dream big.
Once you’ve placed your order with the Universe, the key is also to believe and trust. It is very easy to go down the rabbit hole of doubt, and it is likely that you will at certain moments. We are human. Be gentle and kind with yourself. Beating yourself up over any negative thoughts won’t bring you to a place of faith and trust, it will just make you feel worse about yourself. If you can, kindly turn your thoughts and energy towards gratitude and love.
When you feel inspired to take action, it’s go time! The Universe will give you signs and signals for what action steps to take. A random idea might pop into your head to do something. Don’t question what that is. You do not need to understand how it is important and how it will all fit together. One day you may look back and smile at the coincidences and circumstances that brought you to where you are.
The energy is intense right now, with many world events bringing negativity and fear into our lives. Many people feel as though they are in the throws of change, but are so unsure of tomorrow that they feel paralyzed with indecision. Be gentle and kind with yourself. You don't need to know the whole path. Just become clear on what you what and move forward, with baby steps if you need to. Believe and trust that these changes will take you to a better place. Enjoy the mystery as it unfolds. And most of all, love yourself throughout the process.