The Art and Practice of Letting Go

Do you find yourself dealing with the same issues over and over again, or working towards a goal that doesn’t seem to ever manifest? It seems that everyone I speak to is continually trying to let go of something, someone, or a patterned behaviour that they know is not working for them. We are collectively in a time of continual change. 

Letting go can be a tricky maneuver. It takes a level of continued commitment.  Just when we think we’ve really let go, wham, something comes up and lets us know we’re not quite done.  How do we best handle the balance of letting go and assertively pursuing for our dreams, or letting go and allowing a situation or relationship to unfold as it needs to, and not on our time.  How do we best let go of situations and or people we have outgrown?

We humans don’t seem to like the unknown. Letting go creates a space either in our minds, or in our physical lives. What will that space get filled with?  We seem to prefer the known, even if it’s not working for us or making us feel good, rather then the unknown, which can be scary.

This is where we can use faith and have a clear intention of what we would like in our lives.  It is easier to let go of something we know is not working for us if we have a clear picture of where we want to be. I will be writing more about creating plans for your dreams in future articles. For this article, I will focus on effective ways to let go.

Let me be clear, letting go does not mean you are giving up. Letting go means you are willing to loosen the grip you have on the reigns of life.  When we hold on tightly to people, situations, thought patterns, we actually constrict energy and don’t allow these things to flow the way the Universe intended.  Letting go means releasing to the Universe, trusting the Universe has your back, and being open to receive guidance on how to proceed. It does require faith; faith that you will be lead to a better place, where situations and ways of being unfold more naturally.

Become crystal clear on what you want in your life - This is critical in the process of letting go. We typically need to let go of something because it doesn't feeling good to be holding on as tightly as we are.  What do you want? For example, if you are in a bad romantic relationship, become clear on what it would look like and feel like if you were in your ideal relationship.  Visualize it, take yourself there completely in your mind and in your heart.  The more you do this, the harder it will become to stay in your current situation. You will be drawn to make changes as the dichotomy between your visualization and your reality is too great.  You will either work on and heal the current situation, or move on much easier knowing with clarity what you really desire.

Continue releasing - I used to believe that once I released something to the Universe I was good to go.  I was sadly wrong.  If you really want to release something, you need to keep releasing it until you feel better.  Even then, it may creep up on your years down the road and you may feel discouraged, that this is cropping up again.  It just means you need to do a little more work releasing. Stay committed to releasing it, not falling into victimhood or a feeling of helplessness.  An example of this might be releasing anger or unforgiveness towards a person.  We all have situations and relationships that may not have ended well. Your happiness and feeling of peace comes from you being able to forgive that person, and yourself if necessary, Wish them well in their life. Send them love if that feels right to you.  The more you continue to release and forgive, the better you will feel. This doesn't mean you will necessarily let them back into your life or change the circumstances with them. This is a an internal, emotional process.

Try new methods to release - My go-two releasing method is to affirm that I wish to release something to heaven and then to visualize it being carried away by angels.  If I’ve done this a number of times and don’t feel as though I’m being successful in releasing it, I know I need to try something new.  There are many different methods to ceremoniously release something.  You can write down what you want to release and burn it. This is especially effective if you burn it on the evening of a full moon.  You can write down what you want to release and drown it in water. If you are working towards dreams and goals and you feel like you’ve been trying and trying to manifest them and there’s limited success, write down your goals and bury them in the ground. Liken that to planting your dreams. Often just writing down what you want to release and your intention to release it, can be very effective. 

You can use certain crystals to clear energy, burn sage or use essential oils. Information on how to try these methods can easily be found on the internet. An important aspect to all releasing is your intention to do so, and your commitment to making a conscious effort to release. Find ways that work for you and be open to trying them, even if you feel a bit silly.  For thousands of years, people have been using ceremonies and performing rituals and that is because they work. We have become a practical society that often scoffs at rituals. Be open to their magic and power.

Avoid retelling or talking about your situation in a negative manner - We often become so attached to our stories that we allow them to define us. Do you often find yourself talking about a situation that was particularly stressful in your life? There is a fine line between talking about the situation with a trusted confidante for healing and closure, and talking about it in idle conversation. Every time you retell the same story, you relive it and go through the same emotions. Try and catch yourself if that happens. You can easily change the subject and move on.

This also involves being mindful of the conversation you are having with yourself. Do you keep telling yourself that you won’t ever be healthy, or have the financial security you desire?  Every time you speak in the negative about your dreams and goals, you are sending an energetic vibration out into the Universe that you don’t have the belief that you can create these things.  The Universe will respond in kind and ensure you don’t receive them.  The law of attraction is a very powerful force, and is working all the time.

Change your focus to the blessings in your life - This is almost becoming cliche these days.  The reason the concept is so prevalent is because it works!  Focussing on blessings and what you love about yourself, your life, your relationships, etc. changes your entire demeanour. Your body’s vibration will change and you will feel better about whatever it is you are trying to release. And it just feels fantastic. There have been times in my past where I have been in a funk and I have sat down and written out 200+ things I am grateful for. I will just keep writing until my heart is swelling with gratitude and love. If you look around there really is so much to feel blessed about!  Clean running water, shelter, people to love, grass, trees, the beautiful blue sky, a delicious cup of coffee. The list really is endless.

An important realization is also that you are not alone. Absolutely everyone has gone through and is going through something that they are needing to let go of and release. It a part of the human experience we all signed up for.  Don’t get down on yourself if you are struggling with it, just keep at it. You really do have the strength to see this though. The Universe wants you to succeed and have everything you heart desires.